One of my biggest priorities after the wedding was to make sure I sent out my thank-you cards as soon as possible, NOT six months to a year later.
No such thing as you have up to a year to write thank-you notes. The thing is that people have up to a year to send you a gift, and you need to acknowledge it in writing ASAP once you get it.
It's definitely not something you can push aside for too long, and the longer you wait, the more awkward it'll be to write them.
Ideally the groom should help out writing his share of thank-you notes but in my situation, I felt that people would be offended by Dave's penmanship so I had to write every. single. one.
It was a lot of work writing them. It took up my evenings for the first month and a half of marriage.
Now as I approach our first year anniversary, I don't have to worry, have guilty feelings, and come up with excuses about my rude behavior in not writing my thank-you notes.
A lot girls complain about writing them.
Think of it this way, if someone took the time to write you a check, you can make time to write a thank-you card.
Also if you had the nerve to mention your registry on your invitation, you should write a thank-you note for the gifts that you were upfront about in expecting when inviting someone to your wedding.
(I think registry info on invites are impolite, and always will be, no matter how discreet you make it on your invitation)
Reasons for writing a thank-you card soon after your wedding:
1. Shows your graciousness toward the generosity of the giver.
2. Lets giver be assured that their gift was received. You don't want them to go to your mother-in-law and say "Hey I gave so and so $500, but never received a thank-you card; I don't even know if they even received my gift!"
Here are some rules:
- You must write a thank-you note for every present you received and without delay
- Thank-you notes must be handwritten. If people can write you a check, you can certainly write a thank-you letter.
- Sending only a picture of you and your new spouse kissing and holding a thank-you sign does not count as a thank-you note.
- You don't need cards that say "Thank You" on the front. What matters is the content of what you wrote to the giver. Blank stationary cards are easier and less expensive to order.
- No need to send postcards. The cost-difference of producing them and sending them out isn't much different than buying blank cards and mailing with the first-class stamp.
- Don't begin your thank-you note with the phrase "Thank you for the...." It sounds trite.
- With cash/gift cards, don't write "Thank you for the $_____ you gave us" That also sounds trite. Say something to the extent of "Thank you for the very kind/thoughtful gift. For larger sums of money, say something like "Thank you for the very kind and extremely generous gift" Don't mention the amount. Also say something of what you bought or planning to buy with the money you received. "It was just enough for us to buy a silverware set that we've been wanting"
- Don't write something that everyone else writes in their thank-you card for their cash gift "We're going to save the money for a house." Are you really?
- Send a thank you card before cashing your checks. You will earn tool status if you cash your checks but fail to acknowledge the giver. Also write down the addresses from the checks before cashing so you know where to send the thank-you note.
- There is nothing lamer than getting a Christmas card that says "Merry Christmas!! and btw...thanks for the gift you gave us last spring" Hmmm...what took you so long to say thanks? The sooner, the better!
- Don't write a thank-you note for a present you didn't receive.
All that being said, I managed to send all of them out within a month and a half of the wedding. A few weeks after that, my mother-in-law sent me a text saying:
"I want to let you know that one of my friends told me she received your thank-you card and said it was one of the nicest thank-you cards that she has received in a long time. Thank you for being so diligent in sending them out!"
See??
